Speak ill of someone who is not in the room and the first casualty is the mood of those who heard you: ‘Abdu’l-Bahá names backbiting the leading cause of the friends drawing back from one another, a divisiveness that dampens zeal and quietly empties a community. Bahá’u’lláh forbids it in the same breath as murder and adultery, and says it quenches the light of the heart. Yet the remedy He proposes is not a tightened lip so much as a redirected gaze: busy yourself with your own faults, look for the perfections of others, and, like Christ before the dead dog, find the white teeth. The listener carries a share of the responsibility, and can turn a damaging story aside with courtesy. Truth is no defence; a fault truly described in someone’s absence is still backbiting. The Qur’an sets suspicion, spying and backbiting side by side, makes the injury vivid in a bodily image, and ends in mercy [1], which is also where change becomes possible. The road onward passes through silence and fewness of words, the golden rule and regard for one’s neighbour, and the difference between words and deeds.
O beloved of the Lord! If any soul speak ill of an absent one, the only result will clearly be this: he will dampen the zeal of the friends and tend to make them indifferent. For backbiting is divisive, it is the leading cause among the friends of a disposition to withdraw. If any individual should speak ill of one who is absent, it is incumbent on his hearers, in a spiritual and friendly manner, to stop him, and say in effect: would this detraction serve any useful purpose?
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, 1900 or <, to Baha'is of Tihran -- AB00073)
02
First a few people say something hateful about a person and generally there is a fragment of truth in what they say. The story grows, is spread, the circle widens, discussions are indulged in inharmony, schism takes place - what a waste of precious time that could and should be used for constructive work.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words to Marie Watson et al in Aug. 1921 -- ABU3199)
03
Thou seest how conflict hath arisen among them after God forbade them this, to such extent that some denounce others as infidels and backbite their loved ones behind their backs, such that the fragrance of love hath been lifted from their midst and hatred hath settled in their breasts, as though they had turned away from God their Creator and followed what their souls desired and their passions craved.
Furthermore, some had secretly begun to speak ill of others without cause, and these individuals gradually increased in number and were daily multiplying. It was observed that if this situation were to continue in this manner, this condition would spread to all, and in this manifest Day such a state must not and should not exist.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, to Mirza Siyyid Muhammad Afnan (Aqa Mirza Aqa Nurud-Din) -- AB02453)
05
How couldst thou forget thine own faults and busy thyself with the faults of others? Whoso doeth this is accursed of Me.
… Ascribe not to any soul that which thou wouldst not have ascribed to thee, and say not that which thou doest not. This is My command unto thee, do thou observe it.
(Bahá’u’lláh, Hidden Words - Arabic, 1274 ca. [1857-1858] -- BH00386)
06
Hear no evil, and see no evil, abase not thyself, neither sigh and weep. Speak no evil, that thou mayest not hear it spoken unto thee, and magnify not the faults of others that thine own faults may not appear great; and wish not the abasement of anyone, that thine own abasement be not exposed.
… The tongue I have designed for the mention of Me, defile it not with detraction. If the fire of self overcome you, remember your own faults and not the faults of My creatures, inasmuch as every one of you knoweth his own self better than he knoweth others.
(Bahá’u’lláh, Hidden Words - Persian, 1274 ca. [1857-1858] -- BH00113)
07
That seeker should also regard backbiting as grievous error, and keep himself aloof from its dominion, inasmuch as backbiting quencheth the light of the heart, and extinguisheth the life of the soul.
(Bahá’u’lláh, Kitab-i-Iqan (The Book of Certitude), 1278 ca. [1861-1862], to Haji Mirza Siyyid Muhammad, great uncle of the Bab (Khal-i-Akbar) -- BH00002)
08
Ye have been forbidden to commit murder or adultery, or to engage in backbiting or calumny; shun ye, then, what hath been prohibited in the holy Books and Tablets.
(Bahá’u’lláh, Kitab-i-Aqdas (The Most Holy Book), 1290-05-15 [1873-Jul-11] -- BH00001)
09
Say: Beware lest ye backbite one another. This is what We have forbidden in the laws and ordinances.
Say: O people of creation! Hearken unto the call of the Lord of invention and cast off the nature of beasts. Adorn your temples with the ornament of love and fellowship, and be not of the heedless. Beware lest ye backbite one another, and beware lest ye commit that which would grieve the hearts of the servants of God, the Lord of all worlds.
(Bahá’u’lláh, 1305 ? [1887-1888], to Abdu'llah -- BH00204)
15
Verily I say, the tongue is for mentioning what is good, defile it not with unseemly talk. God hath forgiven what is past. Henceforward everyone should utter that which is meet and seemly, and should refrain from slander, abuse and whatever causeth sadness in men.
(Bahá’u’lláh, Kitab-i-'Ahd (Book of the Covenant) -- BH00003)
16
In this year, which is one thousand three hundred and six, a Tablet was revealed in the handwriting of the Wronged One wherein this exalted word shone forth from the horizon of the Most Exalted Pen: "O people! Make mention of the servants with good, and speak not of them with evil, nor with that which would grieve their souls." Even the mention of evil hath been forbidden in this year, for the tongue was created to make mention of God. It would be a pity to defile it with backbiting or to utter words that cause grief and distress to the servants.
(Bahá’u’lláh, 1306-10 [1889-May], to Zaynul-Abidin who has attained -- BH01592)
17
One day, Jesus son of Mary - may my spirit be sacrificed for Him - was walking with several of His disciples when they came upon a dead dog. They expressed disgust, saying they detected a foul odor. That Source of compassion and mercy said, "How white are its teeth!" Observe now how He concealed the fault - may my spirit be sacrificed for His loving-kindness. This was solely to teach His companions that all should fix their gaze upon the good deeds of others and conceal one another's faults. We bear witness that He is verily the All-Knowing, the Wise Teacher.
(Bahá’u’lláh, 1293? [1875-1876], to Shaykh-Ali Khi -- BH00418)
18
I hope that the divine friends will become completely averse to backbiting and each will praise the other, and know backbiting to be the cause of divine retribution, reaching such a degree that if anyone speaks a word of backbiting they become disgraced among all the friends. For fault-finding is the most detestable characteristic. One must seek to discover the praises of souls, not investigate people's faults. As much as possible, one must overlook faults and discuss people's perfections, not their deficiencies.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, 1913-Aug-10, to M G Skinner -- AB01933)
19
We should never speak of the faults or weaknesses of others; we are as yet imperfect. We must concentrate on the good qualities of others. Virtues are to be found in every person if sought for.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words to Laura Clifford Barney (?) spoken around 1906 (?) -- ABU0190)
20
Admonish the Friends so they will not backbite and criticize, voicing the mistakes and sins of others. Have a sin-covering eye.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words spoken at 309 W 78th St in New York, 1912-Jun-11 -- ABU0436)
21
The language of criticism and fault-finding is bad. It has become however the second nature in some people. All these evils are issued from self-adulation and personal conceit. Man must be pleased with all mankind and displeased with himself. For example: We have come often across a person who is a liar, but he censures another soul because of the same tendency; or a person is stingy and close-fisted, yet he takes his brother into account for the same unlikeable habits.
Man must not see the evil qualities of the people; he must look at his own shortcomings and make an effort to remove them.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words spoken on 1914-Jun-03 in Tiberias -- ABU1094)
22
Why should we be tattlers and busy-bodies and gossip-mongers? Why are we not looking at our own shortcomings? Why do we not let people alone? Why do we not search after our own faults?
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words to a Christian minister, spoken on 1914-Jun-09 -- ABU2326)
23
Heedless souls are always seeking faults in others. What can the hypocrite know of others' faults when he is blind to his own?
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Public address given at Hotel Victoria on 1912-Jul-25 -- ABU1360)
24
No Baha'i should open their lips to criticize another, and should consider backbiting the gravest error in the human world, for in all the Tablets of Baha'u'llah it is explicitly stated that backbiting and evil-speaking are satanic whispers and suggestions that destroy the foundation of humanity.
A believer should not criticize even strangers, let alone acquaintances, and should not backbite enemies, much less speak ill of friends. Backbiting and evil-speaking are attributes of the sick in mind, not the righteous.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, 1911-Apr-28, to Baha'is of the United States -- AB00182)
25
Never has it been permissible for anyone to speak critically of another, even if they be among the wicked - how much less so for the righteous, even if they be strangers - how much less so for loved ones and the virtuous.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, 1900 or <, to Haji Muhammad Ismayn Yazdi (Alexandria) -- AB01326)
26
And as for other matters, my advice to you is not to mention anyone negatively, even by allusion or suggestion.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, 1896 or <, to Muhammad Mustafa Baghdadi -- AB06702)
27
You must certainly exercise the utmost vigilance and explicitly forbid everyone from this, for no habit is more harmful than this trait of fault-finding, especially in relation to the Cause of God. Never should anyone express a word or hint that is unworthy about any of the friends of God. How strange that one should be occupied with the faults of others while heedless of his own faults! This is the path of the spiritual ones. Exercise the utmost care in preventing this habit and never allow anyone to utter anything except praise.
If any one comes to you and endeavors to belittle the station of another in your presence or speaks in any terms against another, you must not listen; nay, rather, excuse yourself by saying that you are a Bahai and that you cannot hear anything but the praise of your brother.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words spoken on 1910-Feb-19 -- ABU3227)
29
If some people come to thee alone complaining against each other, don't listen to them, don't let them breathe the faults of others in thy presence. Tell them: "I have not come here to engage my time with these things.
[In a Tablet addressed to Munirih Khanum, 'Abdu’l-Baha advises that if in the andarun women related something about some person, the hearer should observe complete silence, engage in communion with the True One and say that the remembrance of God is best.]
Remember, above all, the teaching of Baha'u'llah concerning gossip and unseemly talk about others. Stories repeated about others are seldom good. A silent tongue is the safest. Even good may be harmful, if spoken at the wrong time, or to the wrong person.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words spoken in Oct. 1911 in London to Mrs. Enthoven -- ABU1113)
32
Above all other things we must be honest to our consciences and not dissimulate. We must not speak against each other either publicly or privately. We must not belittle the services rendered by others because they are not so fortunately situated as ourselves. We must be humble. We must not have the spirit of destructive criticism. Before making any statement we must investigate it well, whether it is true or not. We must not make the hearts of other people sad. We must speak with gentleness and brotherliness. We must not backbite.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words spoken at Baltimore Hotel in Paris, 1913-May-16 -- ABU1005)
33
This action of God, as all bear witness, were it not that their desires prevent them from truth and sincerity - in such case the servants who are focused on the Most Great Horizon must follow the Truth, let alone speaking of what they have not seen and mentioning what they have not heard.
How then could it be that the friends of God would plot against you? Hold fast unto the manifest certitude, turning away from idle fancies and vain imaginings."
(Bahá’u’lláh, 1299-09 [1882-Jul], to Qain, Muhammad Husayn (Tihran) et al -- BH01112)
35
Blessed art thou for having cast aside idle fancies and taken hold of that which hath been revealed from God, the Lord of the seen and unseen.
By God's life! The ocean of certitude hath surged before the faces of men, yet they hasten toward idle fancies.
(Bahá’u’lláh, 1297-09-19 [1880-Aug-25], to Aqa Muhammad Rahim -- BH06210)
36
I have seen none save those who walk the paths of vain imaginings, for all today are veiled from the Point of Will and the all-embracing Word, and like the peoples of old and new, they cling to their own idle fancies and suppositions, turning away from the Sovereign of certitude. Thus was it before and thus shall it ever be, if ye be of them that know and are assured.
There are many bad people in the world; have nothing to do with them. Do not gossip about them. It must be so that your very silence should be blame (reproof?) itself.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words to the Kinney party in 1909 -- ABU2182)
38
There are many bad people in the world - have nothing to do with them - do not gossip about them. It must be so that your very silence should be blame itself. Do not spoil your tongue with the mention of evil people.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words to Mr and Mrs Kinney et al around Aug. 1909 -- ABU2107)
39
People speak too much because they seek fame, because they wish to be thought better than their brethren. Those who do most good say the least about it.
Time passes in vain talk, and when it ends there is loss upon loss and evident deprivation.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, 1911-Jul-14, to Mashhadi Rahmatullah et al -- AB05672)
41
Profitless discussions fatigue and weary a person. People who call on me almost every day carry on a stream of profitless, unspiritual talk and I must listen to them with patience.
(‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Words spoken on 1914-Jul-28 in Haifa -- ABU1295)
42
"Now, if you occupy yourselves, for instance, in affirming some reasons for the truth of this holy Cause and how to deliver the Word of God to everyone, these things will support and strengthen you and will prepare you for the good of this world and that which is to come; but if, God forbid, you lose your time in vain chattering and useless talk and running hither and thither, these things, be sure, will never lead you to the way of salvation.
Further quotations · supplied wording and references
43
As regards backbiting, i.e. discussing the faults of others in their absence, the teachings are very emphatic. … Even if what is said against another person be true, the mentioning of his faults to others still comes under the category of backbiting, and is forbidden."
LG#305 (11 Feb. 1925 on behalf of Shoghi Effendi)
Supplied quotation · catalogue passage not verified
44
You must not see evil as evil and then compromise with your opinion, for to treat in a smooth, kindly way one whom you consider evil or an enemy is hypocrisy, and this is not worthy or allowable. You must consider your enemies as your friends, look upon your evil-wishers as your well-wishers and treat them accordingly. Act in such a way that your heart may be free from hatred. Let not your heart be offended with anyone. If some one commits an error and wrong toward you, you must instantly forgive him. Do not complain of others. Refrain from reprimanding them, and if you wish to give admonition or advice, let it be offered in such a way that it will not burden the bearer.
We are like ploughmen each of whom has his team to manage and his plough to direct, and in order to keep his furrow straight he must keep his eye on his goal and concentrate on his own task. If he looks to this side and that to see how Tom and Harry are getting on and to criticize their ploughing, then his own furrow will assuredly become crooked. On no subject are the Baha'i teachings more emphatic than on the necessity to abstain from faultfinding and backbiting while being ever eager to discover and root out our own faults and overcome our own failings. If we profess loyalty to Baha'u'llah, to our Beloved Master and our dear Guardian, then we must show our love by obedience to these explicit teachings. Deeds not words are what they demand, and no amount of fervour in the use of expressions of loyalty and adulation will compensate for failure to live in the spirit of the teachings.
COC#1272 (12 May 1925 on behalf of Shoghi Effendi)
Supplied quotation · catalogue passage not verified